Joke of the Week

MORE CHURCH BULLETIN BLOOPERS

Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking tonight at Calvary Church. Come tonight and hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.

Next Sunday is the family hay ride and bonfire at the Fowlers'. Bring your own hot dogs and guns. Everyone come for a fun time.

The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water."
The sermon tonight: "Searching for Jesus."

Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.

Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of Pastor Jack's sermons.

Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say "hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.

Don't let worry kill you -- let the Church help.

Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.

Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoy sinning to join the choir.

Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person(s) you want remembered.

Attend and you will hear an excellent speaker and heave a healthy lunch.

The church will host an evening of fine dining, superb entertainment and gracious hostility.

Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 P.M. Prayer and medication to follow.

This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn sing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.

The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The Congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.

If you enjoyed these bloopers, you may also get a kick out of the first installment of 'Church Bulletin Bloopers'.